She lives with her grandmother in a house with a tin roof (really?) next to a cemetery. She mocks him for it which doesn’t seem an especially clever thing to do to a recently attacked vampire. Hahahaha DeeAnne is such a cheap tart who the eff is DeeAnne? But we learn that our protagonist is called Sookie Stackhouse and the vampire is called Bill. It was brave,’ he said in a voice so seductive it would have shivered DeeAnne right out her red nylon panties. She rescues the vampire, who attempts to put the moves on her. The vampire has gone off with the Rattrays, so it’s our narrator to the rescue! The fight is written very well Harris’s narrative is naturally quite simple and to the point, and it works really effectively here. I feel sorry for you, unnamed protagonist. We also find out that she has only one friend in the world, fellow waitress Arlene. Jason, narrator’s brother comes in, and charms the pants off every single woman in the bar through…no, I’ve got nothing, aside from the implication he’s some sort of SECHS GOD.

Aside from finding out about the bad people, the Rattrays who have been in jail and are vampire drainers – vampire blood, in the Harris universe, acts like a wonder drug, and it’s very expensive. Is that a thing people do? Is this your disability? YOU CAN READ MINDS? That’s… awesome. I’d very rudely listened in on their thoughts. So far, so average, aside from the narrator’s inner thoughts, which are peppered with anecdotes… and then SOME BAD PEOPLE COME INTO THE BAR, WHO ARE ALWAYS MEAN TO THE NARRATOR. how? You just described yourself as the perfect pinnacle of womanhood….fuck it, at least you’re not Bella Swan thus far.Īnywho, a vampire with a ‘Byzantine’ nose comes into the bar, orders a red wine, and the narrator simpers over him.

We are then given a detailed analysis of why she’s pretty – blonde hair, good figure, blue eyes… am i supposed to care at this point? Our currently unnamed narrator is a waitress, who I unfortunately take a dislike to at first. The said bar is in a town called Bon Temps, near New Orléans, in Louisianna. We’re straight into the story here, and it interests you straight away – there are vampires? How? What? Why? Are they in the open? They’ve come out of the coffin (hurr hurr) and are now legally recognised, at least in the United States. I’d been waiting for the vampires for years when he walked into the bar.Īs first lines go, this is a really, really good one. Nothing’s more Christmassy than vampires. Well, it’s Christmas, so why not indulge in the 12 chapters of the very first Southern Vampire Mysteries being reviewed on a day by day basis?Ĭause you just should.

Dead until dark cover